I watched the movie and I have to say, it was spot on with so many points. Why as women do we make up excuses and rationalize that there is reciprocal interest from random men that we meet? My boyfriend said it best when he stated that if a guy is into you, he will let you know. He is chock full of guyology. We’ll get to his guyisms later on. I can’t count the number of times men feigned interest and when they saw I wasn’t going home with them, quickly retreated to the hills. Then again, I had a list of things that turned me off from the first few minutes of conversation. I am one of those girls that can talk to a man for about a minute and tell where he should be filed; Banish from Memory guy, Friendship guy, or Future Potential guy.
Easily Recognizable Creeper Moments
When a guy starts talking about a relationship past, present, or future (with you) within the first 15 minutes of conversation, you need to move on. Often times, in my sitch at least, guys would complain about how their exes dumped them wrong and they clearly were in need of an emotional rebound. There is nothing more unattractive about a man than desperation. The hottest man around will lose his “it” factor if he appears needy or emotionally vulnerable too quickly. This is not to be confused with seeing emotion as weakness or a negative. You know these men when you see them. The other guy in this scenario is the virgin or the inexperienced man. He is so desperate to not only have sex, but just be within 2 feet of a woman that he oozes desperation that can be detected across a crowded room. I, myself fell for this type of guy even though he said to me “God I hope this turns into a relationship” on the first date. The key is confidence. Even if you don’t have it, fake it. Eventually you will start to believe it men!
A man who cries to you either in person or on the phone is a sure sign that you need to run. Again, emotion is not to be considered a weakness but for the love of Pearl, don’t put all of your cards out on the table in the first quarter! Remember, this is a guy you have just met. For example, I met this guy some time ago and I was in a desperate place as was he. The difference was, I still had some checklist and some expectation of what I wanted. He on the other hand started talking about an ex that cheated on him and eventually dumped him while he was in the military. Sure, I cut him some slack but then took it back when I found out it was not like he was in Iraq or anything. He never left the states! I went out on a date with him, we kissed but something about him creeped me out. He called me and I told hm that I thought we should just be friends and hang out. We did have fun together. He agreed. We went out and had a good time. At the end of the night he went in for a kiss. Apparently “friends” meant something different. I never called him again.
Then there was “the virgin” as mentioned above. You know, the guy who put all of his cards on the table on the first date. I didn’t get he was a virgin until two or three dates in as he revealed it to me in a passionate kissing session. I was blown away. I didn’t think he was a stud but at the same time I didn’t think he was untouched. I really liked this guy despite his weird obsession with geeky things. After all, I am a geek too. I like him despite his chronic cheapness and his potential lack of moving forward with his career. I even liked him despite his creepy, overbearing mother who suggested I take her hand me down clothes, three sizes bigger that I wore. What sealed the deal was when I found two very disturbing things in his room. The first: porn. Not just regular old porn, but niche porn. I won’t go into detail. Nothing illegal but extremely distasteful. The second: He had begun collecting my hairs that he found and began saving them in a baggie. He said he “felt closer to me” or something just as odd. I realized that no matter how attentive and how adorable he was, he was mentally, emotionally, and physically at least 18 years old. He was actually 23 or 24 when we were dating. He wasn’t able to socialize with groups of people in an adult setting and he felt uncomfortable with the idea of being an adult. We dated for a whole 10 months. It was quite sad and I do hope he has found happiness and maturity.
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